Goodbye Love
by RyeBreadQueen
Summary: Jamie dealing with everything after Sydney leaves,and questioning himself along the way.
1. Chapter 1- Shock

Chapter 1

Jamie Reagan sat in his brother's old car at a stoplight, pondering all of his life decisions. He had just left the loft that belonged to him and Sydney. Well, just him now he supposed. He was helping Sydney pack up the rest of her belongings and said goodbye. She was leaving for the airport just after he left.

He drove in silence, but his head was screaming all sorts of things at him. He became aware when he nearly swerved off of the road and waved an apology to the woman in the car next to him, who he figured was probably cussing him out right now.

He sighed. Not to say that he hadn't had his wonders, he always had some thought in him it would happen. He just expected it to be earlier, not when they were already almost a year and a half into their engagement. He was proud of her for getting the position, of course he was, he just wished she could've been closer. He started to wonder if the engagement would have actually lasted if Sydney hadn't been offered the position in London.

He pondered not even showing up for Sunday dinner, but he knew that it was considered almost a sin to miss, especially without informing anyone before him. It would be hard enough not having Sydney next to him, but explaining and worst, giving the ring back to his father. He could already hear Danny's words 'You had it coming to ya kid, you weren't taking very good care of her. That's where ya screwed up kid.'

Jamie frowned as he felt the ring in his pocket. He hated the feeling of it being there, it was just a reminder of what he did. He loved Sydney and he probably always would, but his family always had top priority to him, and with that came finding the truth behind Joe's death. He hadn't told her what he was looking into, he knew she wouldn't approve and tell him how dangerous it was and try to convince him to stick his nose somewhere else.

He remembered her reaction to his wanting to be a cop. "You wouldn't succeed as a cop, they don't make enough money, you're too naive, and you just… wouldn't be a very good one." At the time her words had hit Jamie like ice, but now he was starting to think that maybe it was true.

As he neared the Reagan house, he tried to contemplate what he would say to everyone when he arrived. He knew he was late, that wasn't the problem. He parked the car and sat in the driveway for about five minutes. Jamie let different options play over and over in his head, trying to decide which one to pick to use on his family.

"She's sick? No. Work? No, she never works Sundays."

Jamie groaned in frustration. He decided he just wouldn't say much at all, and offer the least amount of explanation as possible. He sighed and hoped that his plan would work, though seriously doubting that it would. He put his hand on the ring again the closed his eyes, trying to forget Sydney and everything about her.

He knew it wouldn't happen, there was no escaping it. He took a deep breath and prepared for his family's words, hoping they wouldn't be too hard on him. Jamie reluctantly got out of the car and went inside. He heard nothing, realizing his family must have just sat down for dinner. Sighing, Jamie put on his mask and entered the dining room.

"Hey, sorry I'm late" said Jamie roughly, folding his jacket and sitting at the Reagan family dinner table.

"No Sydney?" Danny asked, prompting Jamie to shake his head. Everyone at the table looked around at each other except for Jamie, who carried on as if business was usual. "Where is she kid?" Danny asked. Jamie's body tensed as he sighed "She's busy. Can't be here." Danny just shrugged and continued eating like normal.

At some point during dinner, the topic of conversation switched to weddings. "Have you and Sydney set a date yet?" Erin asked, to which Jamie merely shook his head again. Danny sighed and kissed Linda on the cheek.

"Do you have to do that in here?" Jamie said harshly.

"What's with you today kid? You're acting like the world's up against you, which I can assure you it is not."

"Well not everyone can have a perfect marriage and a happy ever after Danny!" Jamie shouted, causing everyone to fall silent and stare in shock.

"Kid I wasn't trying to-"

"Just shut up Danny, you don't… you just don't get it!" Jamie stood and tossed a ring onto the table before leaving the room in a huff, quickly leaving out the back door and pacing in the backyard.

Everyone at the table stared at the ring, stunned.

"Francis is that?" Said Henry quietly.

"Yeah Pops. Mary's engagement ring. The one Jamie proposed to Sydney with. I know that's the one. "

The table suddenly erupted into a fit of emotions. Danny, and Erin showed their anger. Cursing Sydney's name for leaving their baby brother alone. Linda and Nicky were emotional, feeling bad for Jamie and also sad to see a romance go to waste. Henry sighed, feeling remorse for not being able to figure it out. Frank simply sat in silence, waiting for the storm to end.

"Well I can't say I didn't expect it. Their relationship has been tense since-"

"Ever since Joe died. Sydney was never very empathetic of that. "Danny said, interrupting his sister.

Suddenly Sean piped up "Is someone gonna go talk to Uncle Jamie and make him feel better? I don't like seeing him so sad…" He said, sighing and then looking back down at his plate.

Everyone looked at each other for a moment before Danny spoke. "I'll talk to him" He said quietly, getting up and going to the backyard after his brother.


	2. Chapter 2- The Storm Will Pass

Author's Note: Okay so I'm really glad that this god such a good start! It's my first published story and I'm planning on there being about five chapters in total. I hope you enjoy and I will update as much as I can but I happen to have somewhat of a life. This chapter is a bit short and somewhat emotional so if you get emotional easily I hope you have tissues. Also in this chapter I made Sydney appear to be a little worse than she was, but I never liked her so I felt like it was somewhat necessary to make her a little more terrible. Although my writing makes me feel bad for Jamie. I guess that's just how this works. Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter, and I will do everything I can to update by Tuesday, I can't make any promises though.

Chapter 2- The Storm Will Pass

Danny Reagan stepped up to his brother, who was pacing angrily. "Kid. Hey, kid stop pacing, it makes me nervous."

"What exactly would you like me to do Danny?" Jamie said as he turned, the way the sun made his face shine making it obvious that he had been doing some crying. But Danny didn't comment on it.

"Settle down, I'm just trying to help. Now sit and tell me what happened." Danny said calmly, to which Jamie eventually gave in and sat, Danny sitting down next to him to be able to listen.

"Well, it's been rough…ever since Joe died. She never exactly… tried to make me feel better. I mean she offered her condolences and such but it almost felt like she didn't even care. So a couple days ago, I found her in a club after getting a call from the bartender that works there, he's a good friend of mine. When I got there…she…she was all over a guy. He um. He went to Harvard with us. She told me it was just a drunken mistake and I was stupid enough to believe her. So last night I was working on…a project. And she woke up… she told me she got offered a job in London. I obviously told her I couldn't go with her. Sh-she sat it was fine because this, this guy that I found her with was going too. I didn't know what to say. She already had her stuff packed, she left this morning. Syd just handed me the ring and said goodbye. She didn't even give me a chance to answer before she was out the door."

By the end of his rant, Jamie's voice was weak and shaky. Danny stared at his brother in shock, never expecting to hear what he just did. He felt angry that anyone could ever cheat on his baby brother. His sweet, innocent baby brother. All he could do was put an arm around his brother and pull him into a hug "I'm so sorry Jamie. She didn't appreciate everything you did for her."

"I just. I don't know what to do Danny!" Jamie yelled, standing up abruptly. "I loved her, I still love her and I'm afraid I always will. I just… I just don't know what it is I did wrong. I'm beginning to think that maybe I just wasn't very good to her."

"Don't say that kid. You treated her like a diamond. You did everything for her and she never did anything for you. She was just selfish and just wanted you because you'd be some big fancy lawyer and when you wanted to be a cop all of that changed. I'm sure she felt slightly betrayed but Jamie, she didn't deserve you. You're a big ol' sweetheart and a hopeless romantic." Danny teased, elicting a small smirk from Jamie.

Jamie sighed "I'm going to miss her. It's all I've ever wanted. Just to have a nice, healthy relationship and marriage like you and Linda have. You're always there for her and she does the same for you. I just want to be happy and be in love and have some beautiful kids to call you Uncle Danny. Is that too much to ask?"

"No. I really don't think it is. When the time comes you'll find someone that loves and appreciates you for who you are, not just your family or how much money you have. And it make take some time kid, but it will happen, just keep the faith." Danny gently slapped his brother on the back.

"I hope you're right Danny. I hope you're right" Jamie by now was on the verge of tears, and Danny, instead of teasing him for his tears, he just hugged his baby brother and was reminded of those nights when he was a little kid and it would storm. Jamie would always crawl into Danny's bed and Danny would just hold him until the storm would pass. "I know I'm right kid"

"Thank you Danny. For coming and being with me. I don't think I'd be able to make it through this without having someone. And of all people, I'm glad that someone is you."

"That means the world to me Jamie. And just think happily, this storm will pass. Life will continue and everything will be alright in the end, just you trust me."

And at that, Danny and Jamie hugged one last time, before walking back inside so Jamie could apologize to the rest of the family for yelling and walking out on dinner like that, arm in arm.

Author's Note: Well I hope you all liked that chapter. I'm sorry it was so short though. I hope I can update soon, I have a three day weekend but I am also in the middle of midterms so bear with me here. I'm planning the next chapter to be about the various family members' reactions and thoughts about what just happened and Sydney leaving. This will have taken place during the conversation that Jamie and Danny just had. Until next time- stay cool my lovelies.


	3. Chapter 3- Who To Rely On

Author's Note: Okay guys so this chapter will be about the rest of the family and their reactions/ feelings about Sydney and the broken engagement. I can assure you most of them will not be pleasant words. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Chapter 3- Who To Rely On

For a few moments after Danny had left, nobody at the Reagan family dinner table spoke. Nicky was the first to pipe up "Poor Uncle Jamie. You could always tell how much he loved her. He deserves better than this. Mom, why do you think they broke up?"

"I don't know Nick. I just don't know. Your Uncle Jamie is a very sweet man, I'm sure he'll find the right person."

Henry sighed "Poor kid. And he'd just started smiling again, he was just getting over Joe." The rest of the family nodded in agreeance.

After a few more moments, nobody really had much of an appetite anymore, so they started cleaning plates. It didn't go unnoticed though that Jamie's plate only had one bite missing. While clearing, Frank took a moment to stare at the ring, still in the center of the table. He picked it up and sighed, remembering Mary's tears when he had asked her, and remembering the excitement and nerves on his youngest child's face when he had asked to use it for Sydney.

The seven Reagans gathered in the living room, waiting for someone to say anything. The silence in the room was deafening, and everyone wanted to try and eavesdrop on Danny and Jamie, but knew that the two needed their privacy for the time being. Sean decided to start. "I think this can be good. Uncle Jamie never really seemed happy when he was with Sydney. I mean, she never looked at him the way mommy looks at Daddy."

That earned a small chuckle from Linda "I've noticed. And after Joe died, she wasn't ever really there for him. He'd show up at our house at midnight sometimes after a shift, claiming he didn't want to wake Sydney, but the look on his face… Danny always knew when they had a fight. I think something happened a couple days ago. Danny said he went to have a drink with Jamie and Jamie was…late, which you know never happens. Danny also said that Jamie was off, angry and quiet. When he asked Jamie, Jamie blew it off and left in a hurry, claiming he was just tired and wanted to get home." The family pondered this for a moment.

"I never liked her" Said Henry "She took advantage of him because he would've been a rich fancy lawyer and he's so sweet and he's quite the handsome young man. I just wish I could get my damn hands on her and-"

"Pops. We all agreed to be supportive of Jamie and Sydney's relationship, and we still need to be supportive of him, not weigh him down. Telling him he was taken advantage of will make Jamie feel bad or stupid, and I know we don't want to do that by any means."

"I want to give Uncle Jamie a hug." Said Jack "Is he gonna be okay?"

"Yeah Jack. He will be. We just need to give him some time to think." Said Erin, trying to soothe her nephew.

At that moment the back door opened and in sauntered the two men, Danny before Jamie. Jamie gave a weak smile to his family "Dad… can I uh. Stay here tonight? I don't really want to stay in that loft alone."

Frank simply smiled "You can stay here whenever you want" he said, causing Jamie to nod.

"I'm just going to go get things ready. If I'm not down by the time you all leave… well…goodnight then" Jamie said and gave a nod, going up the stairs. Nobody in the room failed to notice his expressionless face, and therefore as soon as they heard a door close all heads turned to Danny, who suddenly got angry.

"Dammit! She. She cheated on him, and he believed her story. Kid's naïve. It's gonna cause him problems some day. Sydney left for London, she got offered a job over there. She took the damn asshole with her. It's a good thing she's not here right now, or I would give her a piece of my mind!"

The rest of the family started whispering excitedly, Linda trying to calm Danny down. Frank was the only one who remained calm.

"Cheated? Why would anyone do that to sweet Jamie? He's too kind to have to go through something like this" Said Erin, feeling sorry for her little brother.

"It just proves, she was never good enough for him" Said Henry angrily.

Danny sighed "Yeah. But I think the problem is that he now believes that he wasn't good enough for her. Which can be a real issue. Remember his senior year in high school? We… we don't want to revisit that." Everyone in the room, except the kids, who didn't remember the incident being discussed, nodded. Danny continues "After we leave, dad I think you should try to talk to him. He loved her, he won't get over this overnight."

Frank nodded "I will. I'll talk to him after everyone's left. He'll probably still be up doing something."

The family continued to talk for a while. As it got dark, Henry turned in. By around nine, Erin had left with Nicky and Danny had left with Linda, Jack and Sean. Frank sat in his office for a time, contemplating what to say to his youngest son. He took a deep breath and turned off his lamp, leaving the office and climbing up the stairs. The house felt eerily silent, and he almost turned back, thinking Jamie was asleep, before hearing a small curse.

Frank walked down the hallways to where Jamie's room had once been, filled to the brim with books and academic awards, and where he slept when he stayed the night. He paused a moment and then gently knocked on the door. "Jamie? Can I come in? I think we need to talk." After a minute of no answer, Frank tried opening up the door. Locked. He pushed harder and the door eventually opened. He gasped, absolutely shocked at what he saw.

Author's Note: Yay so I ended on a cliff hanger because I decided to be mean. Next we get a heartfelt conversation between Jamie and Frank…or do we? And what did Frank find when he opened the door? I guess you'll just have to wait and find out! I will try to update as soon as I can, probably not until Monday because I am busy tomorrow! Please review my lovelies!


	4. Chapter 4- It Will Be Okay

**Author's Note- I'm sorry this chapter took me so long, it took me a while to get my ideas together for it. I still am not 100% in love with it but it will have to deal. Either way I certainly hope you enjoy. I warn you that this chapter is a bit depressing and it may seem a little bit OOC but I did my best with the ideas I came up with. I've also been working on the next chapter in my A-Z Whump which I'll be updating the same day I update this so check that out too! Anyway here goes nothing!**

Chapter 4- It Will Be Okay

Frank took a deep breath as he slowly entered Jamie's room. The potent smell of alcohol immediately hit his nose. The room was almost completely dark, the only light coming from the hallways and the alarm clock on the nightstand. There were at least five empty beer bottles on the bed, surrounding the outline of a body. His heart broke as his youngest child sat huddled in the bed, holding himself. His eyes were red and puffy, and there were obvious tear stains on his face. Jamie looked up at his father as he entered and took a deep breath.

"Dad… I just want to know what I did wrong." He croaked, hugging himself tightly, a pleading tone in his voice.

Frank sat down on the bed next to his son, frowning slightly. "You did nothing-"

"She said it was me. That it was my fault. That I wasn't there enough for her. She's right dad. I can't provide for her on a cop's salary. I've just worried all of you ever since I joined the academy. I've been distant. Haven't been home for her. God, dad I'm such an idiot." Jamie choked on a sob "Why am I such an idiot?" Jamie said interrupting, looking up at his dad. The look in his blue eyes reminded Jamie of the puppy dog face he would give him and his mother when he was little. It always worked, even on his siblings.

The older man sighed. "Jamie. You were always there for her. You're the one who held her as she cried off her stress for finals. You're the one who took care of her when she had the stomach flu. She wasn't there for you. When Joe died, she wasn't there. In body she was, but she wouldn't even let you cry you said. She just wanted money and a nice, proper Harvard lawyer, which is not the Jamison Reagan that we all know and love. And I believe she cheated on you, not the other way around." Frank put his hand on his son's back, immediately wishing that Mary and Joe were here to help him.

Jamie took a deep breath and started sobbing miserably. Frank pulled his youngest child in his arms and just held him. He held his baby boy while he cried until the crying eventually stopped. They both sat in silence for a while until the boy's breathing evened out, signalling that he had fallen asleep. Frank refused to move, he refused to leave his distraught child by himself.

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Frank stayed with Jamie until morning, and even though he wanted to keep an eye on his son, he allowed himself to sleep for a bit, until he saw the sun peeking through the blinds, at which time he shook Jamie lightly to wake him up.

Jamie opened his eyes, blinked, and looked up at his father "Morning dad" He said quietly. It was obvious he was trying to hide everything that had gone down the night before by avoiding the reason he was here in the first place.

Frank smiled at the boy "Good morning Jamie. Do you have to work today?" He didn't want to push his son and make him withdrawn, he already had that problem and it was bad enough without help.

Jamie nodded "I've got the afternoon shift, so I can stay here for a bit and just relax." Jamie wasn't one to get bad hangovers, he knew how to old his alcohol. Which had been surprising to his older siblings, who thought he'd only be able to down a few glasses before becoming wasted. But to them it was a pleasant surprise.

"Do you want me to stay?" The older man asked. Jamie narrowed his eyes a bit but eventually nodded "Could you?"

Frank nodded "Of course I can Jamie. I'd do anything for you. I'd do anything for any of my children. That included you"

Jamie half smiled. "I know dad." He paused "How do you get over it?" He asked helplessly, laying back down on the bed.

"You don't ever really get over it when you lose someone you love. I think you know that Jamie. With your grandma, then Mary, then Joe. Even though they are no longer here to love you, you still love them and you won't ever forget them. It's the same with Sydney. Even though she's not here and she doesn't love you any longer, which I'm sorry to say this Jamie but I don't think she ever did, you will always love her and regardless she impacted your life. In a good way. I think you definitely learned something. You learn something from every relationship, whether it turns out good or not, and I think in this case it has taught you something about yourself, as in what kind of women are good for you. It's also taught you what not to do. Jamie, I know it hurts now, but things will get better. I promise."

Jamie smiled and nodded. In that moment he knew his father was right, everything would be okay.

 **Author's Note- Okay guys well I think that's the end for this story. Be sure to check out my A-Z Jamie whump. I appreciate all reviews and suggestions, even if they're negative. Constructive criticism helps me to be a better writer. I'm stirring up some ideas in my head, but I need to know which one to write first because I have so many ideas in my head. Anyway, until next time my lovelies.**


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